Namesake

I’ve set up Google alerts for my name, primarily to monitor any mention of my book, but also to judge the size of my electronic footprint and determine what fat needs to be trimmed.  What I’ve discovered about those who share my name is rather interesting.

My Google alerts say that Thomas McKenzie is typically a happily married man with a loving wife and two or more children, usually daughters.  More often than not, he is a pillar of the community; a lawyer, a veterinarian, or a minister.

A Twitter bio for one Thomas McKenzie reads: “I am a husband, father, friend, pastor, writer, storyteller, blogger, critic, runner, speaker, and by grace alone the one whom Jesus loves.”

Well done, Thomas McKenzie. You’re best mates with Jesus!

Another: “Father Thomas is the first Pastor of Church of the Redeemer.  He, his wife, and two daughters have lived in Nashville since 1999.  He is originally from the Texas Panhandle.  Thomas is a graduate of the University of Texas at Austin.  His Master’s Degree in Divinity is from Trinity School for Ministry in Ambridge, PA.  He was ordained in the Anglican Communion in 1998.  He currently serves as a missionary to the U.S. under the authority of the Archbishop of Rwanda and the Anglican Mission in the Americas.”

Good job, Thomas McKenzie!

Unfortunately, Thomas McKenzie is also frequently discovered shot in his home.  He is often involved in bar fights.

Example: “Miami physician’s assistant Thomas McKenzie pleaded guilty today to defrauding the Medicare program in connection with a $119 million HIV infusion fraud scheme, Acting Assistant Attorney General Matthew Friedrich of the Criminal Division and U.S. Attorney R. Alexander Acosta of the Southern District of Florida announced.”

You made a poor choice, Thomas McKenzie.

This one *really* hit home, and my heart kinda went out to his friends and family. (The similarities between my life and his are a tad eerie.)

So to all the responsible Thomas McKenzie’s out there: well done, lads!

SORT YOURSELF!

The rest of you lot: You’ve been warned.

TWM

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Categories: Uncategorized

4 thoughts on “Namesake

  1. Hey Thomas McKenzie. Thomas McKenzie here. I’m actually both of your first two Thomas McKenzies. I guess that means that your list of “good’ Thomas McKenzies has decreased by one. Sorry about that.

    You and I are likely the only people on earth who have a Google alert set to “Thomas McKenzie.” The Google alert is a weird thing that usually brings bad news. We’ve lost a number of us to accidents, and there are a few of us in jail (especially in Canada and Scotland). Also, we seemed to serve some Scottish Lord about 150 years ago. That one comes up every once in a while.

    I’m thinking I might buy your book and pass it off as my own. That way I can be an accomplished novelist and not have to work so hard. In return, I’ll say “hi” to Jesus for you. 🙂

    OK man, keep it real.

    Thomas McKenzie

    1. Dear Thomas McKenzie,
      That has to be *the* greatest comment I’ve ever received on this blog. Thank you for being one of the good guys, paths to evil being wide and generous and all that. *Should* you decide to purchase my novel, please try not to be offended by anything between the covers. Scandal and intrigue pay the bills, and keep me in coffee. Also, if it turns out you actually *like* it, I’ll certainly pay for the return postage once I’ve autographed your copy. Keep on keepin’ on, and thank you for your sterling example.
      Sincerely,
      Thomas McKenzie

  2. Love it! What an atypical comraderie you seem to share with the other Thomas McKenzies of the world. Its charming, really. I don’t think I could connect with any of my name twins in this manner. For me, like all the other Erins I have met, there is only room for one “Erin” in my life – usually, that’s me. So, it begs the ineveitable question – what the heck IS in a name, anyway?

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