Re: ply

Dear Dave,

I enjoyed your review.

My only argument is that, as kids, we had the chance to see Kirk, Bones and Spock in all those early episodes, and in all those *unique* situations (the first inter-racial TV kiss: Kirk and Uhuru! So many plotlines torn from the pages of a tumultuous era of history!*), visiting all those worlds, getting with all those lovely ladies (and on a shoestring effects budget no less), over the life of the first series. We invited those pivotal characters into our homes week after week, and got to know them slowly, over a number of profound conversations.

Scientifically smooth.

You can’t really judge one movie against the dawn of a new universe. Besides, those early years, man, that was a time when “Star Trek” as an idea was coming almost completely out of left field. “What the hell is this, ‘Wagon Trail for the Stars’?” It was all acting, and very little FX.

So they’ve rescued the franchise. Fine. I’m in favor of it, I guess. (Though I much preferred “Enterprise” with Scott Bakula at the helm. “Deep Space 9”, not so much. “Voyager”, no thanks.)

I’m in favor of “Casino Royale” for the same reasons you are, I think: please, stop threatening-slash-saving the Earth, stop with the gadgets, and take us back to the days of strong heroes; a close shave, a strong drink and a good left hook. Give us back our Connery, our Lazenby (you can keep Moore and that Other Fellow. Brosnan was OK, I suppose. Cold War, and all that.) Put fedoras on our spies and cut back on the CGI. Give the world some much-needed CLASS. Not everything needs to be brought back BIGGER AND BETTER.

Does it?

There’s an endless list of ‘meh’ movies coming out now (“Knowing”, I’m looking in your direction) that, had they debuted when we were still young enough to consider Donkey Kong cereal as a balanced breakfast, would have blown our pre-pubescent minds and shaped our culture in countless ways. As Chuck Klosterman wrote in “Sex, Drug and Cocoa Puffs”, “In a roundabout way, Boba Fett created Pearl Jam.”

Think about releasing something like “Close Encounters” now: Wouldn’t happen. Couldn’t happen! We’re too jaded. And that’s a shame. Movie-wise, we’ve had naughty limo-time with so many coked-up Hollywood starlets that the sweet, caring girl next door doesn’t do it for us anymore. There’s no way we’re gonna be able to get off properly because we’re over stimulated. We expect everything from our movies these days. If, in the next Die Hard movie (because you know it’s gonna happen), Bruce Willis doesn’t engage in a 128-clip gun battle aboard a burning QE2 which just HAPPENS to be on a high-speed collision course with Alcatraz Island, against a crack squad of martial arts-trained leather clad cyber-baddies hell bent on “ruling the world”, we’ll walk out of that theater bored, Tweeting and craving Starbucks. We’re spoiled. We’ve had it all handed to us.

I say start taking things away, but that’s just me…


*What “firsts” are left for us? Full frontal male nudity on the evening news? As if Bush wasn’t enough of a dickhead. Every day in every way we’re pushing back the boundaries set by the FCC, but it’s kind of a hollow victory. If you think about it. What purpose does it serve? And please, don’t tell me freedom of expression.

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